Chapter Nineteen: Bathing the Boss

Bathing—a word that easily inspires flights of imagination. At least, for Mayona, several scenarios flashed through her mind in an instant. Judging by the Poison Dragon’s voice, she guessed that its human form must be quite beautiful. She pictured the two entering the bathroom together, their voices mixing in disharmony, perhaps even washing each other. Such thoughts made Mayona sigh inwardly, lamenting the decline of morals in modern times.

Yet, reality turned out to be somewhat different from her expectations. She quietly followed Ruby to a clearing, the ground blanketed with fallen leaves from the trees above. Ruby knelt and pulled at a rope, lifting a large section of waterproof canvas. Beneath it lay a square pit, roughly a hundred meters on each side and twenty meters deep, its walls and floor gleaming with metallic sheen. At its center, a large drain stood out, clearly modified by Ruby.

The Poison Dragon’s full length barely exceeded sixty meters, so she fit comfortably in this massive bath. At Ruby’s request, Dragoon transformed into a giant circular showerhead thirty meters in diameter, suspended above the Poison Dragon’s head. Scaling up Earthly tools was no trouble for the Blade of the Invisible, though he was not pleased.

“So this is what you call bathing?” Mayona tugged at Ruby, who was busy donning a hazmat suit. This was a far cry from the pink-tinted fantasy she had envisioned, and she felt a bit sorry for Ruby.

“What did you expect?” Ruby retorted, wrapping himself tightly. He had no intention of dying in the Poison Dragon’s bathwater. The suit was crude, but waterproof enough.

“How long is this going to take?” Mayona hesitated to speak her thoughts aloud, glancing at the dragon’s massive body—up close, it was like a small mountain. Ruby would surely have a hard time tackling this alone.

“It’ll be quick.” Ruby set up scaffolding around the bath, climbed up, and began scrubbing the dragon’s body with a brush he had made himself. The steel bristles would have sliced deep wounds into human skin, but for the dragon, it was the perfect pressure. Mayona helped by fetching a fragrant wooden bucket from the warehouse, filled with bath gel. When the brush was dipped in the gel, it produced a profusion of soap bubbles.

Surrounded by bubbles, Ruby’s figure became hazy, the floating foam reflecting the forms of dragon and man. The dreamy scene made Mayona feel a surprising envy toward the Poison Dragon.

“I added ingredients to the bath gel to nourish dragon scales. How does it feel?” Ruby asked as he carefully cleaned each gap between the scales.

Feyloxes replied with delight, “It’s wonderful! Other dragons ask why my scales look so pretty. I’d never tell them.”

Despite Ruby’s promise of speed, bathing a giant dragon was no small feat. He started in the afternoon, and by the time he finished, night had fallen—though some areas remained untouched. Mayona remembered the scene vividly.

“Lift your tail,” Ruby said after cleaning most of the scale-covered body. The next step was to clean the unscaled parts—the dragon’s more vulnerable areas.

“I said, lift your tail.”

Seeing Feyloxes unresponsive, Ruby raised his voice and repeated himself.

“…I’ll wash that part myself,” Feyloxes replied, her enormous tail swaying, her tone slightly awkward.

“Can you reach it? That’s probably the area that needs cleaning most.”

“You’re so annoying!”

Ruby’s work was done, but Feyloxes wasn’t satisfied. After Ruby plugged the drain with a massive stopper, the pool began to fill. Once the water covered most of the dragon’s body, she adjusted her temperature, soon heating the water to a pleasant, hot-spring warmth. She lay back comfortably, and Mayona thought she saw a blush blooming on the dragon’s purple face.

“It’s like boiling herself alive, and the toxicity is off the charts…” Mayona commented. The dragon’s poison was not to be underestimated; in less than two minutes, the water turned completely purple, and the rising vapor formed a skull in the air before exploding—sending chills down Mayona’s spine.

“Whew.” Ruby could barely stand at this point; he sat on the ground, breathing deeply to steady himself. Suddenly, a warm glow enveloped him, the caster’s rich magic restoring his exhausted body.

“Healing Light.” Mayona smiled as Ruby looked at her, softly speaking the spell’s name.

“Thank you,” Ruby whispered. Having Mayona around was convenient; at least he wouldn’t collapse from hunger. After dinner, they returned to the pool to check on the Poison Dragon.

“Did the Poison Dragon leave?” The pool was drained, and Mayona was both surprised and indignant. Ruby had washed her for so long, and she left without so much as a thank you. Dragons really were bastards.

“No, she should be coming out soon.” Ruby gestured for Mayona to look closer. White hands gripped the edge of the pool, and soon their owner pulled herself up from the depths.

For a moment, Mayona was at a loss for words. She had always considered her own hair striking, but the woman approaching had hair that was a gradient—under the moonlight, it shimmered with all the colors of the rainbow, though predominantly purple, shifting as she moved. It was the sort of color that would make a fan artist want to smash their palette, impossible to recreate.

Vertical pupils marked her as nonhuman, but even those eyes were hard to look away from. Mayona had always thought her own eyes beautiful, but in comparison, it was impossible to judge—a ruby laid beside purple amber, each appealing depending on the beholder’s taste.

Her face? There was little to say. Even that rascal Moers had a cute face, so as an adult dragon, Feyloxes was unsurprisingly stunning—she’d cause a riot among nobles if she ever entered the imperial capital. But most striking were her breasts: just a glance left Mayona feeling incapable of comparison. What were those, exactly? Why did they sway with every step, and how was that possible? Were those really breasts? And they defied gravity—such massive fat should sag at least a little, yet they stood so firm she felt they might poke her in the face. It was infuriating.

Mayona felt that, rather than a dragon, the woman before her was a cow spirit transformed into human form.

“Ruby, thank you.” Feyloxes’ body was still damp, the moisture lending her an added allure. She came to stand before Ruby, disregarding dragon pride to offer a sincere thanks.

“Here.” Ruby accepted her gratitude, handing her a towel and glass bottle. No one dislikes beauty, but the sorceress beside them was nearly blackened with jealousy; Ruby thought if Feyloxes didn’t cover up soon, she’d be attacked.

“Glug, glug… Nothing beats drinking a bottle of coffee milk after a bath. Only you have it, it seems—I’m already addicted.” Feyloxes obediently wrapped herself in the towel, uncapped the bottle, and drank the milk in one go, her satisfaction obvious.

“Sadly, human lifespans are short. Before you realize it, I’ll be gone.”

“Why spoil the mood like that? I was just starting to relax.” Feyloxes, annoyed, poked Ruby’s nose with her finger, though she couldn’t deny his words.

“All right, that’s enough. Bath’s over, you can leave now.” Mayona pressed Feyloxes’ arm down, expressionless, stepping between her and Ruby. Seeing those masses of fat up close only worsened her mood.