Chapter 135: An Indispensable and Crucial Character in Countless Dōjinshi

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Chapter 135: An Important Character Missing from Countless Adult Fanbooks
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Zheng Jian had no intention of babysitting the Twin Dragons. He was not after the Longevity Formula, so what reason did he have to follow them around?

Even if he teased them relentlessly, the two of them could not produce much resentment value at their current stage. That was a terrible bargain. No deal!

He firmly kept one principle in mind: harvesting resentment value. There were two basic points to it—find the pretentious show-offs, and find the argumentative trolls destined to cross his path.

By the time he returned to the city gates, night had already fallen, and the gates were still shut.

“Is the Great Sui’s curfew really this early?” Zheng Jian thought, somewhat speechless.

Then he noticed that the area beneath the gates was packed with dark silhouettes—at least a thousand people.

There were no torches in the darkness, yet no one seemed particularly panicked.

Zheng Jian took one look and realized that these people were organized and disciplined. Was something about to happen?

“Let the Sea Sand Gang display its might!” someone shouted from the darkness.

“Dongming is in danger!” someone else shouted back.

Zheng Jian immediately became interested. The Sea Sand Gang and the Dongming Sect?

He was in no hurry to return to the city. Since he had nothing better to do, he might as well take a look. Perhaps he could harvest some resentment value while he was at it.

Thus, Zheng Jian quietly blended into the crowd. A burly man soon came over and asked in a low voice, “Which branch are you from?”

Zheng Jian casually made something up. “The Yuhang branch.”

The burly man handed him a red headband. “Put this on. The chief will be here soon.”

A short while later, the city gates opened. Several riders galloped out and arrived at the front of the crowd. Their leader was huge and powerfully built. Standing there, he resembled a black iron tower—eight feet tall, with an eight-foot waist. Horses could run along his arms, and people could stand on his fists!

Beside the giant stood a pretty nun dressed in a loose Taoist robe. But when the cold sea breeze blew through the night, the robe clung tightly to her body, revealing her graceful curves.

Zheng Jian distinctly heard the sound of someone swallowing behind him...

“A bunch of horny perverts,” he thought disdainfully.

The black iron tower was probably Han Gaitian, the Dragon King and leader of the Sea Sand Gang. And the pretty nun beside him must be the mermaid, You Qiufeng. She certainly had plenty to offer...

At that moment, Han Gaitian began delivering a pre-battle speech, and the gang members below responded with enthusiastic cries.

They were still a long way from the docks, so they did not have to worry about the Dongming Sect overhearing them.

Before long, the Sea Sand Gang’s forces set out, and Zheng Jian followed along in the crowd to watch the excitement.

The Sea Sand Gang first reached the coast, where ships were already waiting. They anchored three or four miles from the large vessel belonging to the Dongming Sect.

Once they arrived, the various branches organized their members and began boarding. Taking advantage of the darkness, Zheng Jian slipped away. With his movement skills, he vanished without making the slightest sound.

After leaving the Sea Sand Gang, Zheng Jian headed toward the docks.

Sure enough, he found a gigantic ship moored there. Zheng Jian knew that this had to be the Dongming Sect’s vessel.

He knew a little about the Dongming Sect. There was Madam Dongming, Shan Meixian, and her daughter, Shan Wanjing. In his previous life, they had appeared in countless adult fanbooks that had served as many people’s first introduction to certain things.

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A friend of mine once said that in some of those books, the mother and daughter had an astonishing amount of screen time...

Ahem.

That was enough said.

Just as Zheng Jian reached the edge of the dock, a burly man dressed in white martial robes blocked his way.

“Who goes there?”

Zheng Jian smiled faintly. “A guest.”

The burly man fell silent.

There was nothing wrong with that answer.

Resentment value from the nameless burly man: +500.

Ignoring the stunned man, Zheng Jian walked straight onto the Dongming Sect’s ship.

A dozen or so men in white martial robes stood on the deck, each of them imposing and formidable. Now they gathered around him, coldly observing this uninvited guest.

Warrior, warrior, warrior, warrior, warrior, Zheng Jian, warrior, warrior, warrior, warrior, warrior.

Tell me that isn’t padding.

“Hey, what are you all staring at? Is this how the Dongming Sect treats its guests?” Zheng Jian asked, displeased.

A gentle, melodious voice immediately drifted out from the cabin.

“Please forgive us, Young Master. Come inside, and we can talk.”

Only then did the surrounding warriors disperse. A petite maid came over and said in a clear voice, “Young Master, please follow me.”

Zheng Jian strolled after her. He did not forget to cast a provocative glance around at the warriors, as if saying, “If you’re unhappy about it, come and hit me.”

The warriors: (╰_╯)

They entered the cabin and walked down the long passageway in the middle until they reached the last door on the left. The petite maid pushed it open and said crisply, “Young Master, please come in.”

The room was spacious and exquisitely furnished. A hanging curtain divided it into two sections.

“Please sit, Young Master.”

The gentle, melodious voice came again from behind the curtain.

Zheng Jian pondered for a moment, then said, “Madam, could it be that you’ve taken responsibility for all the ugliness in the world and therefore don’t dare show your face?”

Critical hit!

Resentment value from Madam Dongming: +666.

Behind the curtain, Madam Dongming Shan Meixian’s pretty face flushed red with anger. Beside her sat a charming and adorable young woman whose features closely resembled hers. It was Shan Wanjing, who was desperately trying not to laugh.

A fierce gust of wind swept through, and the curtain abruptly rolled up.

Zheng Jian saw Madam Dongming, Shan Meixian, and her daughter, Shan Wanjing.

“So they really are mother and daughter. No wonder they appear in so many Great Tang fanbooks...” Zheng Jian thought to himself.

“Young Master, I’m guessing you must love eating fish, because you seem very good at picking out the bones,” Shan Wanjing said, unable to resist defending her mother.

Zheng Jian froze.

Then, suddenly, he became excited.

(σ)σ:*☆ Oh, nice!

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“Damn, I’ve finally met my match!”

A smile gradually spread across Zheng Jian’s face. If his chair had been able to spin, he would have instantly pressed the rotation button, complete with sound effects:

I want you!

Just as Madam Dongming was about to say something, Zheng Jian spoke thoughtfully.

“They say that a woman without talent is virtuous. Why are you so talented, then?”

Resentment value from Shan Wanjing: +100.

Shan Wanjing puffed out her cheeks and fired back without hesitation.

“So I won’t marry someone like you!”

Zheng Jian: “...”

Reasonable and well-founded. Perfectly logical. Lightning-fast reactions. They were truly evenly matched!

Zheng Jian slapped his thigh and laughed.

“Hey, little girl, do you know why your mother dresses in such loose clothes?”

Shan Wanjing asked in confusion, “Why?”

Zheng Jian pondered for a moment.

“Because... you’re flat-chested, and she’s afraid you’ll feel inferior!”

Shan Wanjing: “...”

Resentment value from Shan Wanjing: +999.

Resentment value from Shan Meixian: +666.

Massive combo! Double kill!

Tears nearly sprang into Shan Wanjing’s eyes.

Madam Dongming Shan Meixian could not bear to watch any longer. Was this man sick? Every sentence he spoke was covered in thorns!

“Young Master, I assume you did not come here in the middle of the night merely to say such things. If you have something to say, please get straight to the point.” Though Shan Meixian was irritated, her voice remained gentle and melodious.

It reminded Zheng Jian of a saying: a peerless beauty remains beautiful even when she is angry.

Having harvested a bit of resentment value, Zheng Jian was satisfied. He smiled and said, “I was only joking just now, but I really did come here for something. Madam, you’re sitting here in peace, unaware that a deadly crisis is approaching.”

At his words, Shan Meixian’s willow brows rose sharply, and she was just about to lash out when Zheng Jian cut her off.

“If you don’t believe me, go outside and look. A large force from the Sea Sand Gang is attacking!”

At that very moment, a tremendous crash rang out, as if some heavy object had slammed onto the deck. The entire ship rocked.

“Enemy attack!”

...

The fourth update is here! I’m practically losing all my hair! As long as the honored readers subscribe generously, I can even do an extra update in a wig and women’s clothing!

This doesn’t count as a bonus update—it’s the fourth update. I’ll continue updating later. We’re about to break through the next bonus-update threshold, venerable old readers!

Thanks to reader Director 1249 for the 500-site-coin reward. Thank you, big brother!

It’s been so long that my hands have gone numb... My stamina is pretty good, right?

(End of Chapter)